"Hello. My name is Jillian. How are you today?...Thank you!" versus "Roar!", followed by psychotic laughter and some growling sounds - which is more pleasant to hear from a child, especially if you're trying to give them a treat? Manners: we could still stand to work on those.
We all know the saying that's been around forever - "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me". BIG. FAT. LIE. No one is immune to words. The only way we become numb to things is by training our brains to block out the hurt or negativity, and that comes with practice, which is the painful part.
A mom we often talk to at Little Gym revealed recently that she can't stand clutter and mess. She would just die if she ever came to visit out house, but that's besides the point. She said that she is constantly telling her son when he asks for different art supplies to have at the house, "no, honey, that's just for school" so she doesn't have to deal with the cleanup and setup. I kept my thoughts to myself, but in my head I was wondering if her son had a strong desire to be creative and she was unknowingly crushing his artistic spirit because she's a neat freak, and he'll grow up to think doing art and creating things is wrong or bad because it's messy.
You may have read our Facebook post a few weeks ago about what our daughter said at school while she was playing in the kitchen center. She called her imaginary kids, "crackheads" and asked them what type of beer they wanted. She swears she said "root beer", but we're pretty sure she didn't. Her teachers weren't sure what to make of it, although they know what her dad does for a living. Unfortunately, she learned the other word from me. She's learned lots of probably undesirable phrases and words from me. We spend lots of time in the car together driving to and from school, and rather than cursing when other drivers do things, I call them names, like "crackhead", "pee-poo", "poopyhead", "hippy", etc. It could be worse...right?
"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind" - Dr. Seuss. That's true to a certain point. My husband isn't quite sure what to do with us when LP and I get wound up if we're both tired at night. We feed off of each other's silliness and laugh hysterically in our fits of delirium. But that saying doesn't mean we should feel free to sling around hateful and mean thoughts either. It has been brought to my attention recently how often people judge each other. It really hurts when it's done to us, but when you catch yourself doing it and then realize how regularly you do it (even if it's in your head and not out loud) it can be quite eye opening.
It is a challenge for me to completely stop cursing, but I know I need to. It's taken me an incredibly long time to filter as much as I do, and having so many things in my head to keep track of now as a mother and professional the judgmental thoughts aren't present nearly as much as they used to be because there's no room. But they're still there. As always, we have to remember to think before we speak, even when we're trying to be funny. Little ears pick up everything we say and can be easily influenced, especially when they love and admire the person who is saying it.
