Friday, June 20, 2014

Body Image

Oh you last 15-20 pounds...if you didn't make me look like I ate too many donuts or drank too much beer, I might not care as much.  Or if I didn't have a closet and a half worth of size 4 clothes that don't fit because I'm now a size 12, and I don't want to buy too many size 12 clothes in case I actually lose some more weight by the end of the year.  That's my goal.  What I've been told by other mothers and friends is that it took "9 months to put the weight on, it'll take at least 9 months to get it off". 

I'm not joining a gym or changing my diet or anything else.  I'm just doing my regular thing and if I lose weight, awesome!  Maybe I should put some more effort into it.  I don't know.  I keep saying I'll try sit-ups or that I should ride my bike more, but it's hard to do things by yourself when you have a 5-month old and a husband who works 12-hour shifts.  That's right - we got married a week ago!  Woohoo! 

Anyway, we all vent about our weight or being out of shape at some point.  Just as I did not like to hear comments about being so thin before (people assumed I was vegetarian or watched what I ate all the time; it's called genetics and a high metabolism), I don't want to hear comments saying that I "have no room to talk" because I've never weighed over 200 pounds or that I've never been a size 22.  I'm sorry you've always been the "fat kid" and that you got made fun of (their words, not mine).  I'm proud of you for trying to change your life so you can lose some weight.  My reality is different from yours.  I used to weight 123 pounds and now I weigh 143 pounds.  The vast majority of my clothes no longer fit and stare at me from my closet.  I'm talking shoes, undergarments, shirts, pants, dresses, skirts....most of my clothes. 

Am I excited about revamping my closet/style/wardrobe one day?  You bet!  But it's expensive and can't all be done at once.  I got some great pieces at the Gulfport Outlets during our honeymoon to wear to work.  I also keep reminding myself that most of my coworkers wear the same outfits over and over again every week so I don't need as much variety as I think I do in my closet.  So far, it's working.